When someone is going through a storm or struggles of some sort, your silence presence is more powerful than a million empty words. Just letting someone know that you are there for them by holding a safe and sacred space around them is, sometimes, all that they need.
Need to Fix
However, this can be difficult for many of us. We, typically, don’t like silence. Just think about when you had your last conversation with someone. Whenever there is a pause in the conversation, someone has to jump in quickly because there is this anxious feel in the air. The void feels like it has to be filled. At other times, we feel as though we need to fix something so, again, we jump in hastily.
Stealing The Moment
Nevertheless, when you fill in this space by giving advice or making comments, trying to fix something or trying to alleviate your anxiety, you take away their moment to feel the emotions and to heal. Instead, they move out of their body, their feeling and emotions, to hear and think what you are saying. They are no longer in present or in silent presence. You just completed a form of distraction and avoidance for them, but for you, too.
There is a time and place to distract or avoid, but when someone is grieving or sifting through confusing emotions that arise from the memories of a traumatic event, for instance, it is, sometimes, best just to listen and give them space – your silent presence. Remember, it is about them; it is not about you and your anxiousness or uncomfortable feelings in this moment.
In the end, when someone is going through a storm, your silent presence is more powerful than a million empty words.