How do you take on healing when it can be enduring? One day, maybe even one hour, at a time. I don’t think most people can truly understand someone that has gone through childhood sexual abuse or a sexual assault except for others that have experienced it themselves. Sexual assault and childhood abuse is too complex, and there are too many variables associated with it.
Helpful In Their Weird Ways
The simple and narrow-minded don’t get the process of healing nor do they get the symptoms associated with trauma. These are the one’s that think they’ve got it all figured out. They, regularly, have endless ideas about what should be done. It troubles me to hear their virtuous comments. For me to deal with these people, I have to believe they are trying in their own weird or self-centered way to be helpful. I can, almost, guarantee that it is more about them than it is about the survivors.
Your Driving Force
I can’t speak for all sexual assault or trauma survivors, but their is a lingering stench left behind; it remains deep within the soul. Nevertheless, this lifts with time and by consistently doing the healing process. For many years, I thought I could ‘kick it,’ just like kicking a bad habit, only later to realize you can’t kick it. However, instead of it being a heavy weight, it became my ‘driving force.’
Self-Care When Stress Arises
Nevertheless, when stress comes knocking at my door, my mind and body go to places that I shouldn’t, and this is where I can feel frustrated. How many more years will it have a hold on me? I want to purge it out – be rid of it – but I can’t or it won’t. However, I think that is where the problem exists. (Click on the link a sentence above and you can read about how I see trauma).
Be Good To Yourself
What I want to say to the survivors, is be good to yourself especially when stressed. Healing happens one day at a time. When those thoughts or feelings creep back take a deep breath, and, if possible, get outside with nature, pet your dog, or call a trustworthy friend, for example. We survived a wicked crime. Because we survived it, we have more power inside. Use it as your driving force to serve others.